i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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