He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
