Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
