my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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