we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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