I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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