I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
