i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
