The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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