Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
