the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
