I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
