I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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