I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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