Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
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