Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize