I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
