I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
