there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
