i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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