? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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