my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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