Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
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