You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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