...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
