my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
