I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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