people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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