You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
