omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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