if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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