Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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