A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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