thus making me awesome and them whores
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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