I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
