The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize