I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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