The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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