you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
