he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
