im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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