Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
