I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
