Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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