There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Randomize
