Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
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