Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
