we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
