That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Randomize
