she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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