i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Randomize
