let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Enjoy the penises
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Randomize
